Short version:

I played for the Bleeding Heartland Rollergirls in 2008, then moved  back to Portland.  In 2009, I joined Wreckers, tried out for Fresh Meat, and was drafted to the Break Neck Betties that summer.  I’ve had the opportunity to play with the Axles of Annihilation when they need warm bodies.  Since I have no natural talent, I have to work for every inch of skill and ability on skates.

Long Version:

(Edited down from a VERY long version.)

In 2005, I got married and moved to Bloomington, Indiana, where my legal partner and lover was enrolled in a doctoral program.  I had a crappy job, few friends, and only saw my sweetie for dinner and again after 10pm.  (Later I got an awesome job.  Hi Ivy Tech!)

One of these very few friends happened to play roller derby for the Bleeding Heartland Rollergirls.  Roller derby did not sound like a super fun pastime.  But it seemed important to my friend, so we went to a bout once, and didn’t hate it.

I went to the rink, and had to pull myself along the wall.  It was my first time skating in fifteen years.  Good exercise, I said.  After a few more nights at the rink and another bout, I had heard about a skills camp coming up, and suddenly thought, well, I could at least give it a try.

The girls were not all 22-year-old rockabilly chicks.  They were nice.  And welcoming.  Even if I did fall down while trying to skate 20 laps in five minutes.  (Nineteen!  I was so proud of myself.)

I started BHRG in December 2007.  A few months later, I was placed on the travel team.  Plenty of people didn’t agree with that decision.  To be fair, I sucked real bad at skating, but I showed up and worked hard.

BHRG Rollerball, January 2008. Me and Mona Mour there in the front.

Brian and I moved back to our homeland of Portland, Oregon in the summer of 2008.

Rose City Rolleeeeers!

The job market in Portland, Oregon was not that great in summer 2008, you guys.  As such, I didn’t go back to skating until after a temp job started looking promising.  After six months off skates, a few months on Wreckers helped me get back up to speed.

I made Fresh Meat (on borrowed gear, as mine was stolen that day) in spring of 2009 and was drafted to the Betties that summer.  All I knew about the Betties was that they were supposed to be the mean ones with red lipstick.

My first season with the Betties was strange and a little terrifying at times, but I made all the rosters and got to skate in bouts every once in a while. Funny thing is, three years later, I’m still in a similar place – I get rostered and get to skate a little, but not much. I’ve gotten better, but so have my teammates.

The Betties won the Rose City championship in 2011 and 2012. In August 2012, I stepped down from the team, but I’m still involved as a volunteer and superfan. Almost exactly one year after that bout, if all goes according to plan, I’ll be giving birth to a baby boy.

So that’s me.