Welcome once again to the Frisky Power Rankings, where I rank women’s flat track roller derby according to my whims/in-depth knowledge.
Seems like there wasn’t a ton of top-level action in July. You had your last-moment games for playoff rankings in June, and then you’ll have your tune-up games in the next month or so. Because…
PLAYOFF SEEDINGS CAME OUT. Who has plane tickets? GUESS WHAT. I’M GONNA GET PLANE TICKETS. Yep, to champs, I think. Stay tuned.
- Gotham. They’re having some friends over on Coney Island this weekend. Sounds pleasant.
- Rose City Rollers. Playing in London on the 8th. Eeeeep!
- London. Eeeep!
- Victoria. Getting coached by Mick Swagger right now. That usually works out for them.
- Ice cream. Ice cream cones. Ice cream bars. Ice cream sandwiches. Gimme.
- Denver. Games against Philly and Gotham will give us a good idea of where they stand at the moment.
- Texas. I wouldn’t be surprised if they were a bit higher in the next month or two. I’m just saying.
- Angel City. Nice win over Minnesota.
- Philly. Games against Montreal, Charm, and Denver will give them plenty to think about/work on.
- Arch Rival. No jokes because they’ve had a tough month. <3
- Montreal. Always a bit of an enigma, non? But they beat Charm City by 200 points? Right time to get neon hot.
- Jacksonville. They get to go to their own playoff! That’s fun/stressful!
- Popsicles. Sometimes you just need to cool down a bit, but you just had ice cream. Just kidding. OR AM I.
- Bay Area Derby. They should be fine with their #2 seed going into Playoffs. Can they get whatever hasn’t been clicking to… start clicking in the next month or so? PLAYOFFS: THE ENCLICKENING
- Minnesota. Yep, they lost to Angel, but that’s not such a bad thing.
- Sun State. *Twiddling my thumbs* Is it September yet? I want to seeeeee.
- Stockholm. See above re: Sun State. Yeah, I could watch archives, but who has that kind of time? What do you want me to do, NOT watch Chopped every night after the kid goes to bed?
- Air conditioning. Sweet, sweet air conditioning.
- Team United. The TURD/Arch Rival game is probably my priority first round matchup. What’s yours?
- Atlanta and/or Tampa. You two are pretty close tbh.
- Rocky Mountain. Losing to good teams is not a bad strategy for them at this point.
- Rat City. Fared a bit better at home against Rose than I expected. Excuse me while I gaze out my window and ponder this quietly.
- Terminal City. They better hope The Enclickening doesn’t take place.
- Dallas. Okay, my twitter friend always asks about Dallas. This month, they’re in! Once again, RollerCon results are shaky data points, but they do have a #6 seed in their hometown playoff. They could do some stuff if Philly’s not careful.
- Windy City. They get a decent seed for playoffs, so who knows? Would you want to play against them?
- When playoff seedings came out, my husband asked me about Oly, and all I could say was ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
- The “we’re having so much fun on our trip” social media posts from Rose people. I mean, I don’t daydream about trips to Vegas in July, but London? *digs toe in ground, closes Facebook*
- “Everyone else.” In rankings past, I’ve listed “everyone else” to differentiate between the top tier and the rest of the pack. The top four this year seem fairly clear, but Denver and Texas aren’t that far behind. Following closely is the expanding middle, with plenty of competitive teams that could make it to champs. THIS RULES.
- The weather in Portland. Um, it’s hot.
What do you think? Who has power? Let us know in the comments. Dish freely, or send me anonymous tips at @littleanecdote so I feel cool. (It doesn’t hurt to ask.)