Welcome once again to the Frisky Power Rankings, where I rank women’s flat track roller derby according to my whims/in-depth knowledge.
Some top-adjacent roller derby action has occurred. For the top 20 or so, this month has been more about getting WFTDA charters finalized for the upcoming action and warm-up bouts as spring and summer get hopping. There have been surprises and transfers for those of us not in the know.
THIS IS NOT A JOKE. I wouldn’t do that to you.
1. Rose City Rollers. Game with Rocky Mountain coming up on Saturday and the website has been down for days. Come through, host.
2. Gotham. Eight (8) skaters remain from their 2014 champs roster. EIGHT. But Swede Hurt is back. This roster is bananas, b-a-n-a-n-a-s!
3. Texas. Did we talk about how they got Jackie Daniels and Sandrine Rangeon because COME ON.
4. Bay Area Derby. New roster released, too. Damn.
5. London. They’ve never played Texas. Did you know that?
6. Cute baby animals. Look, it’s me and Baby Sour!
7. Denver. No action until May, and then LOTS OF ACTION.
8. Victoria. They’re going to The Big O too, and they announced their new roster.
9. Philly. Everyone who’s cool is going to the Big O, seriously. Coming back with a solid group.
10. Angel City. Games coming up in April, yay! We’ll see what Arizona’s deal is, too.
11. Windy City. Matchups with Team United and Minnesota will keep things interesting this month. Check out their new roster.
12. The Big O. Oh I want to go I want to go.
13. Minnesota. Well, hello, I will be glad to make your internet acquaintance soon, new faces.
14. Rocky Mountain. See you this weekend. Please enjoy our many food carts.
15. Team United. WFTDA team now! Attention must be paid.
16. Sun State. Keeping a keen eye on you down there! What’s it like in the future?
17. Jacksonville. Wait, they beat Atlanta like a week ago?
18. Atlanta. … but only by three points.
19. Arch Rival. How did I miss that Bricktator moved there? Bricktator moved there. Then they beat Nashville by a lot of points.
20. Detroit. Moving back in to the top with a big win over Ohio.
21. Dallas. Hi, Dallas! Nice wins in March!
If I missed any rosters, let us know? Let’s chat! Give me all your juicy tidbits (please)!